I have a small confession to make. I like working with difficult people.
This confession may seem odd given it sounds contrary to my goals. As someone who sells and closes technology deals for a living, one would imagine the last thing I would want to face is a difficult person who might make getting the deal done harder.
But the truth is when a negotiation goes really well, and everyone gets along, I don’t get the opportunity to learn.
“Easy” doesn’t teach.
When the party on the other side presents challenges to getting the deal closed, my skills are tested. I have to reach back into my experience and my instincts and shape a plan. I have to think broadly and strategically about how to make my company, and the client, successful, despite the challenges. That’s when I learn more both about the art and science of negotiation, and about myself.
When we are pursuing a goal and we suddenly encounter a wall, we have several options to consider: go around, over, under or through. We must assess the environment and shape the right plan. Going through can result in damage; under, around or over can generate negative emotions. Ideally, we find a way to influence the other party to see that the wall doesn’t just impede our success; it inhibits the other party’s success as well. What does the world of the deal look like without the wall? How much more value can we generate through collaboration? When we are able to articulate that path to mutual benefits, we have found the way to take the wall down together. That’s not the easy way, but it’s the way we get better as dealmakers.
